School Stories

Me and work mate were talking about are school stories… then I thought id see what stories you rascals have of school :D:D

One thing that stays in my mind was a time when me and all the guys and girls at school were hanging around the back by the bike shed’s :wink: We were all gathered underneath a 1st floor extension which housed the girls toilets… anyway, we were all mucking around and I jumped off a wall grabbing onto this pipe which stuck out from under the extension… But just as I was about to perform a mighty swing off it!.. “BING!”… the pipe broke off and covered the girls in sh*t!!!,ha… (and no… I wasnt fat at school, nor am I now!,haha)

I once took our class door of the hinges and then closed the door.

When the teacher went to open it it fell onto the floor (away from him!):smiley:

Another time we went to the market and bought a little chick which we released in class! People thought the chirps were coming from outside untill a girl screamed cause the chick touched her foot!

It eventually was discovered and taken to the headmasters office… poor thing prob got detention!! lol :w00t:

When I was celebrating my 16th birthday by underage drinking with my friends, we gatecrashed a party a teacher of ours was having. He caught us and threw us out.

The head of year found out and tried telling us off by placing three of us in separate corners of her office and sitting in the middle, whilst she turned to tell one of us off, the other two would be silently laughing their heads off. She was trying to say how it would affect our applications for college and all this bullsh*t.

I found out once I had started that at colelge the teachers went to the pub with the students.

I gaffer taped a friend of mine to the outside of a first floor window and shut it.

I locked another boy in the dark room over lunch.

Glued together the pages of the book my economic teacher used to read from in verbatim. Lessons got a little more interesting afterwards.

Picked up two stray dogs on the way to school and locked them in the gym. They er made a bit of a mess.

Used to smuggle friends into the common room to play cards.

Ran a cheap spirits and ciggie racket in the playground, the boys parents used to send their sons in with orders.

Forever skiving off and tramping around London having fun

Ransacked the common room on the last day at school.

Got another boy to do my geography O level course work.

Haven’t really changed that much to be honest.

It is amazing that I did so well at school, coming out with a truckload of O and A levels. I did really enjoy full time education though.

I stabbed the fat kid with a safety pin when I was in Nursery, thinking he’d pop. :smiley:

Had a kid in my french class who was a suck up to the teacher (or as we called him bum licker!) and one day she asked the class a question and he put his hand up so I said to the teacher hope your arse is clean as its about to get licked! and I got susspended for that!!!

and did he? :smiley:

Set fire to the coach on a school trip to France trying to light a banger.

Oh how we laughed. :blink:

My stepson told me a very funny once recently. He was about half an hour into a 40 minute lesson when all of a sudden the stationery cupboard door opens and one of the pupils pops out, apologising to the teacher for being late !
He was sent straight out of the classroom.

Not quite, he leaped about a lot like he was deflating, screamed and bleed a bit too. So my mum had to find a new Nursery. :smiley:

we all set our digital alarm watches to go off at minute intervals. we were then banned from wearing watches with alarms for the rest of the year:D

I hated school with a vengance:angry: i wreaked havoc at secondry school:D Within the first week i’d been kicked out of class and made to stand in the corridor…so i went and knicked a pushbike from the bike shed and happily tore round the whole school on it…indoors of course! Did’nt want to do science so when asked to go get the thermometers out the cuboard me being me decided to drop the whole lot! i’ve never seen a science lab emptied as quick as that day…needless to say i got 2 strokes of the cane for that :w00t: Locked the french teacher in his book cuboard and left him there …got suspended for that lol:cool:lets just say i had plenty of mates who looked upto me…can’t say why lol loved setting the fire alarms off as well never actually lit any fires though, used to love hanging out in the caretakers office smoking and watching tv til the teachers used to come looking for me :w00t: oh i used to lead them a merry dance…happy memories lol:D shame it only lasted a year then i got worse so i got sent to boarding school…best thing they ever did for me:D

We had a full on water fight in our european studies class, in the sense we turned all the tables on their sides and there was like a little no mans land in the middle.

The teacher just sat on her chair and said whatever you do, do not get me wet and left us to it.

in secondary sch, i started a wk later than everyone else, got sent home the first morning i went in, because i accidently punched a girl, a prank went slightly wrong… then when it was gym class i pretended to be ill, bunked off the lesson, so the last girl left had to lock the lockerooms and give the teacher bk the keys, i “accidently” forgot to lock the room and everyones money and mobiles got stolen… always had a dentist appointment at least 3 times a month, despite never getting braces :smiley: got caught sneaking boys into the school, got caught in an empty drama room with a boy i snuck in by a nun, got caught raiding the canteen fridges with my best friends during a parents evening… got caught drinking on the common room roof and smoking… wrote a note during french class about our really BIG teacher and she took it off me and made me explain it to her… :w00t: stabbed my mate (same girl who got punched in the first yr) in the side of her arm during a argument…dont worry she stabbed me bk, got caught kicking the first yr’s in the back of the legs…

apart from that i was good most of the time… :smiley:

there were a lot more girls worse than me too:P

dont remember much about secondry school but do remember when the end of year report came through the letter box and 7 of the 8 teachers, said can not comment never seen him, and yes my dads belt did hurt.

terrorized secondary school…i was erm… a bit erm…HYPER!..

from year 9-10 i wasnt there much, i was off out earning:D

regret it tho…wish i could go back, i wasnt stupid…i just couldnt behave!:w00t:

'Kinnel. No wonder so many of you are bikers.

I hated school with a passion…but then I was picked on and beaten up by the lads a lot cos I was a fat English lass, who had a Dad in the RAF, in a Scottish school.

I think the best thing I ever did was when of the lads went to punch me in the face and I lost the plot completely and couldn’t control my actions anymore…I picked him up and carried over to the wall and held him there until a teacher talked me into letting him go. Strange thing is it felt like I was having an outer body experience. I nearly got suspended but my Mum reminded the school of all the crap I’d been through over the years so they suspended the bully and overnight I gained respect from the rest of them.

The other time was when I had to pay to do an evening class in Maths cos I’d had 2 of the worst Maths teachers in world during my school years so I’d lost interest. Anyway, myself and one of the lads, who was in the same situation as me, had left a nice drawing and message on one of those eejits blackboards during our last class…it didn’t slate him, in fact you’d never think it was about him. It was the night before the exam and apparently our tutor got a telling off from the eejit teacher who had pulled the board down during one of his classes with the 6th formers. He then seen me in the corridor with the other guys and decided to try and humiliate me in front of all the students. He stood there having a go at me and blaming me for the whole thing and said if I didn’t admit to it and apologise he’d stop me from doing the exam. I stood there for a minute with everyone watching and then said the following…“That image was done by a few people and wasn’t aimed at you…you’re just paranoid. Also, remember when my mum was really ill? Well you told me that my homework was more important even if she died…so don’t threaten me…mate…if anyone is pissed off here its me and if you wanna stop me doing the exam go ahead but I think you’ll find you can’t cos I’ve paid to do. Now get your tiny little ass out of my way before I ram this pencil up yer arse!!”. And off I walked. Did the exam and never set foot in the school again!! :smiley:

I threw up once in assembley, unfortunately it was back in the days when they used to sit you on the floor - when the kid stood up in front of me he put his hand back to push himself up…right in my pile of puke :smiley:

I thought it would be a good idea to throw a plastic pear from the French display at our stand-in French teacher whilst he was writing on the board…he turned around just as I’d launched it…and my aim was spot on :hehe:

Also threw a pot noodle out of the top floor window, landed all down the window of the staff room - was Chicken and Mushroom!

Mr Jetstream :

Once in a Science lesson I filled two plastic bin liners with gas from the gas taps and taped up the ends.

Then as the whole class looked on I set them alight as they floated towards the ceiling.

The whole ceiling was engulfed in waves of flame from wall to wall, creating an interesting soot “rag-rolling” effect on the ceiling tiles.

Pieces of molten plastic fell burning in the middle of the classroom.

Later on I was asked not to do this again, because of the redecorating costs and risks to the class.

I was the teacher:)