Leave it to the Mrs Tug

Dear Mrs. Tug,
While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty
Card, the Manager of our store in Watford is considering banning you and your
family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics.
Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our
surveillance cameras:

  1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s
    trolleys when they weren’t looking.

  2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House Wares to go off at 5-minute

  3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.

  4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
    “Code 3” in House Wares… and watched what happened.

  5. August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION - WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.

  6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told
    shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring sausages and
    a Calor gas stove.

  7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he
    began to cry and asked, “Why can’t you people just leave
    me alone?”

  8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror,
    picked his nose, and ate it.

  9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the House
    Wares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the
    antidepressants were situated.

  10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the
    theme tune from “Mission Impossible”

  11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the “Madonna look”
    using different size funnels.

  12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled

  13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed
    the foetal position and screamed “NO! NO! It’s those voices again.”
    And; last, but not least:

  14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while;
    then yelled, very loudly, “There is no toilet paper in here.”
    Yours sincerely,
    Charles Brown
    Store Manager

:smiley: LMFAO!!


Emoticon overload!! :laugh::laugh:

very good :D:):):smiley:

I will admit to doing No.2:cool:

Lakeside IKEA 2002:D

yeah ive heard he has strarted his antics at Asda at the dome roundabout now, you all better watch out cos he could be coming to a store near you soon.

p.s. at least we all know now why he has never got the time to start work his bike

Just in case anyone reading this doesn’t know Tug, here is his passport picture:)

Thats a spitting image of him :laugh:


Trust you!

Have to admit to doing No.1 thou :smiley:

Tescos Cheshunt Brookfield Centre, 2005 - with condoms and Anasol :cool:

lol nice one

JP uses Tesco.com and they are the only two things on his favourites list;):smiley: