HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU’RE OLD AND DON’T
MOVE FAST ANY MORE
ACTUALLY HOW TO CALL THE POLICE IN THE UK - FULL STOP!!
George Phillips of Marsh Green, Wigan was going up to bed
when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in
the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom
window. George opened the back door to go turn off the
light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing
He phoned the police, who asked ‘Is someone in your
house?’ and he said ‘no’ Then they said that all
patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door
and an officer would be along when available. George said,
‘Okay,’ hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the
police again. ‘Hello, I just called you a few seconds
ago because there were people stealing things from my shed.
Well, you don’t have to worry about them now because
I’ve just shot them.’ Then he hung up.
Within five minutes three police cars, an Armed Response
Unit, and an ambulance showed up at the Phillips’
residence and caught the burglars red-handed. One of the
Policemen said to George: ‘I thought you said that you’d
shot them!’ George said, ‘I thought you said there was
Which only goes to prove you shouldn’t mess with old
May have a charge of wasting police time to face but brilliant.