Funny quotes

Off-topic
1

Heard a funny quote yesterday did make me chuckle. lets see how many qutoes we can get. The one i heard was;

" Dont p!ss on my boots and tell me its raining" :smiley:

Iain :slight_smile:

2

I heard this the other day when someone in a slightly arrogant tone said “and your point is?”

The reply “Beyond your ability to understand.” :smiley:

3

Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. You just leave a lot of useless noisy baggage behind… Jed Babbin, former deputy undersecretary of defence

4

“Mr Churchill you are Drunk!” Reply: “Madam I may be drunk; but you are ugly and in the morning I will be sober.”… Sir Winston Churchill :stuck_out_tongue:

5

“If I were married to you Mr Churchill I would put poison in your coffee”

“If I were married to you, I would drink it” Sir Winston.

:D:w00t:

6

“You’ve never been lost until you’ve been lost at Mach 3.” - Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot)

“When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.”… ARMY Test Pilot

“When the military man approaches, the world locks up its spoons and packs off its womankind.”… George Bernard Shaw

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher… Socrates

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something. Plato

I could go on for hours! :w00t: :stuck_out_tongue:

7

“You never know when an old calendar might come in handy! Sure, it’s not 1985 right now, but who knows what tomorrow will bring?” - Homer Simpson

“you know why they call it modern jazz? Because the word crap was already taken”

8

Keep these coming, please.

Off hand, the best I can manage is my mates mum saying " All this artificial feeding, it’s just not natural".

9

me last weekend while fishing…

‘its cold init…looks at that ice…its frozen!’ :D:w00t: my very very blonde moment!