Charlotte Church Down!

Motorcycling
1

Yes folks - your favourite minger- er I mean SINGER - Our Charlotte fell down outside the Metz Bar yesterday after having five too many ‘Malibu and Campari’ ****tails.

Her PR agent, Mr Dom Smoothgit said, "Charlotte was tired after a gruelling recording session and had to lie down onn the pavement for a quick chunder to clear her head’

Ms Church is 57.

2

And then a challenger tank, operated by me, crushed her. And reversed. And crushed her again. And… you get the picture. I was unrepentent. Read my story in the Daily Mirror. Give me money.

3

Those fat gerbil cheeks of hers would destroy that tank mate…

Must eat during her performances