Driving to the office this morning on the M25 motorway, I looked over to my rightand there was a woman in a brand new BMW doing 90 miles per hour with her face up close to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner!
I looked away for a couple of seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane still working on that makeup!
It scared me (and this coming from a bloke…) so much that I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the bacon roll out of my other hand.
In all the confusion of trying to straighten up the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my mobile from my ear, which fell into the coffee between my legs, causing it to splash and burn BIG JIM AND THE TWINS, causing me to scream, which made me drop the cigarette out of my mouth, ruined my shirt and DISCONNECTED AN IMPORTANT CALL.
Ah. You spottted my line manager on her way in. On days other than Mondays she waits till she gets to the SE London traffic lightsfor the makeup. But Mondays are different.
She get’s out of her jimjams and into the power dressing gear at the traffic lights.
It’s not pretty. In fact some of the stuff on the road bed you were blaming on the drunk’s Saturday night kebabs are, in truth, the result of middle class men seeing her changing from the jimjams.
So traumatic is the sight, that reps in BMW’s have been know to travel some miles without breaking a single traffic rule. Cyclists have been known to stop at crossings and red lights.
Just rinse the phone off in warm water (with the battery removed) and leave it a few days to properly dry out. It will be fine.
unfortunately this is a reality and I have experienced it many times myself.
however, in the same manner that you (presumably) dont like being block labelled a tw@t biker along with the ones that make us look bad, note that its not ALL women - and just the ones that drive BMWs :hehe:
Don’t know if this is pointless as it’s foreign, gives an insight into bmw drivers’ minds, is a psstake or just shows straight estonian white guys should give rap music a wide berth. Anyway, song’s title means I Have New Wheels on the Beemer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdaf5F89Quw
Err I drive a BMW…or at least I did before I moved to London, no point driving it here, too much bloody traffic and too many common people using my road!!
There was at least one LB BMW driver who hadn’t read the ‘how to lock your car’ section of their owners manual last week… you know who you are… :w00t::P;)
Under “How to drive your new killing machine”
