5 corporate lessons

Corporate Lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is
finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The
wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs
downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob,
the next door neighbor.

Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800
to drop that towel.”

After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel
and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds,
Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves.

The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back
upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband
asks, “Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door
neighbor,” she replies. “Great!” the husband says,
“Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”

Moral of the story: If you share critical information
pertaining to credit
and risk with your shareholders in time, you may be in
a position to prevent avoidable exposure.

Corporate Lesson 2

A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing
her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an
accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily
slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, “Father,
remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,
changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg
again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember
Psalm 129?”

The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is
weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her
way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed
to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek,
further up, you will find glory.”

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in
your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Corporate Lesson 3

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager
are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil
lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie
says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish.” “Me
first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk. “I want to be
in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in
the world.” Poof! She’s gone.

“Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I
want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my
personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas
and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone.

“OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The
manager says, “I want those two back in the office
after lunch.”

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the
first say.

Corporate Lesson 4

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A
rabbit asked him,

“Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?”
The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat
on the ground below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped
on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing,
you must be sitting
very high up.

Corporate Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able
to get to the
top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t
got the energy." “Well, why don’t you nibble on my
droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with
nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and
found that it gave him enough strength to reach the
lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating
some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally
after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at
the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer,
who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bull**** might get you to the top,
but it won’t keep you there.

Hahahahaha… I love them!!! Thanks C I work in a corporate world, so these are all home-truths!

Really nice one mate! I can’t stop laughing…

good one mate

Now they are funny - great post.

These are really clever Know a few corporate lawyers who will appreciate them


mmmm… how true…

alll sooooo true!