WTF !! Earthquake !!

my work mate wants to know what it would be like to ride in while the earthquake happens.

There will be one up here at Hammersmith if management dont find someone to take me off duty !!

Im stuck here and Im not happy !!!

home time now bud. sorry. sun, bike, misses. in that order. bye bye

I’m from Wellington in NZ and we have them all the time (at least one ok one every 3/4 years). They are part of the reason why the wife does not want to move out to NZ to live (and the weather is the same as here).

It would have to be a big one for you to know while on a big or in a car. There was one in Japan a couple year back. Don’t know about deaths but it did look bad.

i never felt a thing!!!

pity it werent more powerful and flattened folkestone - wot a dump

I was in Folkestone at the time (Eurotunnel). Ground was quite shakey (standing at the time) but it didn’t do anything, not even set off any alarms.

A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter scale hit Essex in the early hours of Friday with its epicentre in Basildon.

Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering “Faaackinell”.

The earthquake decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of damage.

Several priceless collections of mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond repair.

Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros arrived. Essex FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Basildon.

One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said, “It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Victoria-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was skinning up and watching Trisha the next morning.”

Apparently looting, muggings and car crime were unaffected and carried on as normal. The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.


This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after - items most needed include:

Fila or Burberry baseball caps
Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)
Shell suits (female)
White sport socks
Rockport boots
Any other items usually sold in Primark.

Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.

Required foodstuffs include:
Microwave meals, Tins of baked beans, Ice cream, Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.

22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms.

£2 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9.

£5 buys B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

Breaking news

Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry alco-pop. ‘Where are you bleeding from?’ they asked,"

ROMFORD" said the girl, "woss that gotta do wiv you?

Please don’t forward this to anyone living in Essex - oh, sod it, they won’t be able to read it, anyway.