Top this for a speeding ticket...

hi all, stole this from the bhb forum…thought you’d be amused too :smiley:

Two British traffic patrol officers from North Berwick were involved in an
unusual incident while checking for speeding motorists on the A1 Great
North Road.
One of the officers used a hand-held radar device to check the speed of a
vehicle approaching over the crest of a hill, and was surprised when the
speed was recorded at over 300 mph.
Their radar suddenly stopped working and the officers were not able to
reset it.

Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had
in fact latched on to a NATO Tornado fighter jet which was engaged in a
low-flying exercise over the Border district, approaching from the North

Back at police headquarters the chief constable fired off a stiff
complaint to the RAF Liaison office.

Back came the reply in true laconic RAF style:

"Thank you for your message, which allows us to complete the file on this

You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Tornado
had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked onto, your hostile
radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it.

Furthermore, an air-to-ground missile aboard the fully-armed aircraft had
also automatically locked onto your equipment.

Fortunately the pilot flying the Tornado recognised the situation for what
it was, quickly responded to the missile systems alert status, and was
able to override the automated defence system before the missile was
launched and your hostile radar installation was destroyed.

Good Day."

who would have passed it onto the Defence Flying Complaints Investigation Team… who are part of the Specialist Police Wing… who I work for :smiley:

oh. I’ll be good, honest officer i will never speed honest :wink:

It sounds like one of those stories thats untrue but still funny to read.

I’ve heard this in about 3 or 4 different versions … still amusing though.

One of them Urban military myths methinks. Like the US aircraft carrier versus a lighthouse:D

very funny


yes satisfies all of our egos on what we would really like to do to all speed traps…very satisfying to belief it was true…but as all you spoil sports so kindly point out, ruining the story, it likely isnt…;):smiley:

i would of flicked safety off… bombs away hehehe

Curtis you’re such a scrapper :smiley: That kinda thing will result more than two weeks holiday mate :wink:

Probably is an urban legend… and I don’t think the fighters above us are allowed to be fully loaded, unless it’s Conningsby and places like that. Their squadron are scrambled within minutes of a civy plane not responding to control contact, saves another 911. That’s not privy info… I found it on BBC news site :slight_smile:

Oh, I dunno. My brother’sa RAF pilot. He tells me all sorts of funny stories that don’t sound a million miles away from this one (not sensitive stuff, before anyone asks! Even I’m not that special :P). Quite a lot of em involve low flying exercises in Welsh vallies which invariably end up in annoyed farmers and comatose sheep :stuck_out_tongue:

Yep… you’d be surprised the amount of filing that generates Keti. If sheep get worried (non ginge related) then they call DFCIT, eventually the filing heads my way… well it used to, I’ve moved offices thank f*k! You should hear the interview tapes :wink: (the typist sits next to me) very boring, not very juicy and she don’t half swear at the dullness of them :smiley:

Oh Keti that’s made me laugh, we were in Wales again it was early morning and were taking photos of the falls… suddenly from nowhere this jet came hammering past us very low… I jumped out my skin, then 10 mins later the same thing happened. It wouldn’t be so bad if you could hear them coming but you can’t lol… All the way out of Wales we had the same thing happen, I got used to seeing something out the corner of my eye then flying low in front, but a quick blink and it’s all gone lol.

Not only sheep, but people too. In a past life I spent many a week in South Wales where they do loads of flying. Makes for some good viewing :slight_smile:

And Curtis, no wonder you’re on holiday at the moment with that sort of attitude, naughty boy :w00t: :stuck_out_tongue:

Funny, but I don’t think the Tornado is that advanced really :slight_smile:

they fly up the Nant Ffrancon valley…along the a5…and if your climbing on the hills you cacn see them fly below you, its fantastic…and as far as I am aware yes they fly with loaded weapons but mostly in safe mode…so unless they are armed, (ie the safety catch is off and the trigger primed) they wont go even if the plane crashes as the triggers will not detonate the bombs/missiles however a blazing inferno might trigger some of the HE to go off eventually…

sounds like you have a very interesting overview opportunity of the military services bandit bird

I am fortunate to work for a diverse organisation. DFCIT is only a small element of the Unit. I think the low fly zone around the valley is 200 feet. You can find any of this info in the public domain. I’ve signed the Secrets Act afterall and ain’t stupid enough to divulge anything else I see/hear :slight_smile: this is quite a good overview of SPW. Anything specialised about military investigations, they do it. :slight_smile: Just wish the pay wasn’t so crap :frowning:

yep when i was in the army and on excercise we was always told dont **** the sheep off cos u’d get ur ass kicked, they dont like it when smoke grens go off near em :Whistling:

we were on the live firing range at brecon and i was on the GPMG…let of a burst during the assault when the range officer called a halt…miffed as we were I was taken to the targets only to find four sheep sent peacefully to sheepy heaven…they had wandered into the target area before anyone had seen them and right into my covering fire…about 50 rounds of 7.62…oops…

bandit_bird (28/10/2007)

I’ve signed the Secrets Act afterall and ain’t stupid enough to divulge anything else I see/hear :slight_smile:

Me too and had it updated very recently so you can tell me, whisper it into my ear:satisfied: I am sure no one else is listening