After a lunch discussion with colleagues, we were throwing around the classic Swiss Tony catchphrase and adapting it for different things.
Therefore feel free to post your own adaptations of Swiss’s sage advice. Here is one to start you off…
Ah Paul (Swiss Tony’s starry eyed car sales apprentice if you don’t know)…riding a motorbike is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. Ensure you have the correct equipment, keep you helmet clean, and ride her as fast and often as you can…
Washing a motorbike is very much like making love to a beautiful woman… You’ve got to caress those curves. Breathe softly and gently. Pay attention to all the nooks and crannies, make sure you’ve got a nice wet sponge. And always make sure theres plenty of lubrification;)
Buying a bike is rather like making love to a beautiful woman: you get yourself in the mood by looking at lovely pictures in a glossy magazine, you spend a lot of money on making her yours, you buy her loads of nice stuff but then get bored, get rid and get a new one!
Changing your bike’s oil is rather like making love to a beautiful woman… Once you have warmed her up to get the fluids flowing freely, you jack up her rear end (paddock stand) and put on some protection(gloves). After huffing and puffing (with the filter) the fluid gushes into the bucket;)
Making coffee - Making a cup of coffee is like making love to a beautiful woman. It’s got to be hot. You’ve got to take your time. You’ve got to stir gently but firmly. You’ve got to grind your beans until they squeak. And then you put in the milk. 
ooh slarty you dirty dog, didnt know ya had it in ya! hehe, i wouldnt know about any of this women crap as im the only gay in the village!:w00t:
Love it…
Eating KFC is rather like making love to a beautiful woman… Once you have nibbled on the breasts and thighs you are left with a greasy box to put your bone in;)
But you’ve got an imagination, just pretend it’s some young hunk you’ve picked up in a club, how would it go then . . . :P;)
Cleaning downpipes_- cleaning downpipes is like ******* off a man (shut it you lot!) you have to stroke your pipes really gently to start with, getting every inch glistening, till finally you rub hard and polish it off with a nice metal cream polish, to leave a glistening rod…:D:w00t::w00t:
:w00t::w00t::P:cool:
i liked that one CM
