Stopped by armed police...

Well that was a strange day…

It started off worshipping at the temple of DIY, Wickes and Homebase. Then a spot of gardening followed by a trip to the tip to dump an old sofa.

My bike has been off the road for several weeks because I’d decided it was a good idea to strip the forks down, replace the seals, respray (as they were in a bit of a state) add heavier fork oil and stiffer springs. I thought they were too stiff, then I found out I’ve got the wrong oil. Rather then changing the oil, that would be too easy, I bought some more springs from eBay along with a rear shock.

Nothing much happened for the last couple of weeks as I’ve been off on holiday. Last night I stuck the new springs in and today I fitted the forks back on the bike. Then what I thought would be an easy job fitting the shock, a couple of bolts I thought, turning into a bit of a struggle. Not easy when you’ve got a tin roof at an angle and the bike wants to fall over when you’ve got it strung up. Eventually got it back together but I seems the shock is not quite right. It does not seem smooth and is making a bit more noise then I would have expected when pumping it up and down… great. I was thinking of taking the bike to my local deal tomorrow and asked them what they think. If it does need servicing the extra cost means I might as well have just bought a new one!

It was getting late so I jumping in the car and went to the local kebab shop. On the way there you come to a cross junction where you have I turn right. Arrows on the road show you are supposed to cross behind any vehicles that are turning in the other direction. Everybody ignores them though and you just go in front of each other. A big 4X4 comes up and flashes me. Obviously the reason you go back to back is because I can’t see the traffic coming up behind him. I said to myself ‘oh for fcks sake’ then went to go anyway but had to stop to let another car past. At this point I think he is a bit upset and gives a loud blast of the horn, which scared the **** out of the other car LOL. I waved him on. I just thought the 4X4 was being a pratt and having a go. I drove on until in my rear view mirror… blue flashing lights… er, I hadn’t really looked properly at it before. It had been a long day and I was tired, thinking about food and it was getting dark. His headlights had been coming straight at me, which on a wagon that size is right at eye level. The 4X4 was the police. D’OH!! Nil points for observational skills. Pulled in and stopped.

The first thing I get is

‘there is no point calling me a t0sser, in this line of work you get to know when people are swearing at you by reading lips’

no I wasn’t what I was actually saying was…

‘You know why we have stopped you I was signalling for you to go round me’

But I couldn’t because I was already facing towards the direction I wanted to go

‘There was enough room for you to go around me’

No I couldn’t I would have had to reverse.

‘The road was clear. You know you were in the wrong. The council have painted those big arrows on the road for a reason’

There was obviously no point trying to defend myself. I was actually shacking a bit as I had the adrenaline pumping. He tells me to take a breath and calm down, which is when I thing I notice both of the officers have sidearms… I thought I better start apologising…

‘Any points on your licence?’

er, not at the moment

‘Have you got your drivers licence?’


His partner does a name check on radio, then a complete once over the car checking tyres, tax etc. I was all clean obviously. I am sure they wanted to do me for something but unless there was some obscure traffic laws I am not aware of they couldn’t pin me on anything.

You see crap driving on the roads all the time. I’ve tried crossing properly at that point in the past but nobody ever does. Doing it in front of the police is probably not the brightest thing I have ever done. Anyway it looked like I was off the hook and before going I said sorry again. I don’t think he was impressed. He leaves me with ‘enjoy’ like I’ve just got away it but they still think I am some sort of scroat.

Ho hum you lives and ya learns

I suppose it stops them from having to deal with all the rapes ,assaults & burglaries etc that are taking place whilst they are dealing with motorists/bikers giving advice as to why the arrows are painted on the floor.

I’ve seen them arrows I just thought they were warning me to watch out for all the indians !!!

and just to round this story off nicely, went out on Sunday for a bite to eat at local kebab shop. Got in car and was thinking about incident as its the first time i’ve been back that way in a couple of weeks and… the council repainted the arrows. So the dumb arse police that gave me such a hard time and were ****ing rude wouldn’t have a leg to stand on if they had tried it on. Should have taken their details and written a complaint. No offence P.S and Trojan, but these guys need to chill and stop the ego trip ‘I’M THE LAW, YOU ARE WRONG!’


there was a copper at frith last week giving v2 a load of sh*t about moving his bike 10 metres without his lid on. bit blummin unneccessary IMHO. the rozzer had a proper strop on about it

to be fair, if i’ve been a numpty i dont mind a rollocking as i’d expect the police to give others a verbal slap for similarly foolish/illegal behaviour. have had some ‘fair’ chats and some blummin stupid ones from the police in my time.

even had one tell me ‘tell me you were doing 40 and you’re a liar. if you say you were doing 30 i’ll kick you in the nuts’…

er 35 officer?

oh and he then went onto make the point 'what if a granny had been crossing the road? hmm? er what, at 4am? i think my grans clubbing years are behind her personally, dont know about yours…

Hey mine still bopping to all the old classics :slight_smile:

Yeah I saw him but I will say it was a bit daft of V2 to ride the bike when he must have seen a traffic cop there and when the copper approached him v2 did give it the mega attitude.

There was no need for the copper to be there and he did appear to be having a pop at any biker that he had an opportunity too but … why give him some ammunition to have a pop at you ?

Nuts, I’ll always be the first to admit that there are some right clowns wearing a uniform, you just gotta eat a bit of humble pie, humour them, and get whatever they want to say over with quickly, if they are being right nasty buggers then complain after the event - that is the only way to deal with them without you getting any extra grief.

Yeahbut, there’s large areas of London where not being a grandma by the age of 30 carries a significant social stigma…

haha Pat, pmsl

fair point trojan, can’t argue with the non-friendly nature of the discussion and v2 didn’t exactly take it on the chin did he?

I was watching the guy for a while tho and he did seem to be itching to get stuck into anyone he could. seemed fairly pally with the guys he was talking to altho his body language had ‘attitude’ written all over it (not a general police dig i’d like to add, just talking about that dude)

having seen the grief that smiled got for moving his bike a couple of meters, i’ve either pushed the bike or kitted up to shift the bike at frith each tiem. Can’t say that there’s a safety issue about moving the bike a couple of metres but what can do you do eh? still love the fact you can ride a trike or a quad with no lid incidentally

assuming the position is pretty much your only option if they want to give you a going over with their tongue. ahem

I had a mishap with the law once, I was crossing a large (one way) road, as I start nothing is comming then a police car comes round the corner not speeding (at this point) now they could have easily gone round me but no! head straight for me now increasing their speed, I’m still thinking at this point he will go round me NO!!! heads straight for me realises I’m not going to get out of the way in time, slames on the anchors and skids to a stop…

he and his fello officer then proceed to have a go at me for crossing the road… I was actually so shacken up by the fact I nearly got knocked over by the police I just took the ear bashing…

Later realised should have taken the details and reported him…