Nothing to read here…just move along 
Might be Hemorrhoids in which cae you could get some cream for that…
ANALSOL - or something. I dare not google it, but the name rings a bell. You can get it in boots. 
Speak to Westie, he can give you advise on how to “man up”. :blink:
I think the last thing he needs right now is a man up.
LOLOOOL
ERM SPILL, you been trying parking the bike down yer dirt track?:hehe:
My friend reports that the Anusol worked a treat - so passes on his thanks 
Also - he says to be real careful where you leave it - as mixing it up with a tube of toothpaste is always going to end in tears :w00t:
BL
Better than mixing it up with Deepheat.