On a Septic Tank Truck :

> Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels

Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:

> “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

On a Plumber’s truck:

> “We repair what your husband fixed.”

On a Plumber’s truck:

> “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber…”

Pizza Shop Slogan:

> “7 days without pizza makes one weak.”

At a T y re Shop !

> “Invite us to your next blowout.”

On a Plastic Surgeon’s Office door

> “Hello. Can we pick your nose?”

At a Towing company:

> “We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.”

On a Maternity Room door:

> “Push. Push. Push”

At an Optometrist’s Office

> “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”

On a Taxidermist’s window:

> “We really know our stuff.”

In a Podiatrist’s office:

> “Time wounds all heels.”

On a Fence:

> “Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive.”

At a Car Dealership:

> “The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”

Outside a Muffler Shop:

> “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

In a Veterinarian’s waiting room:

> “Be back in 5 minutes… Sit! Stay!”

At the Electric Company:

> “We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don’t, you will be.”

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

> “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

And don’t forget the sign at a Radiator repair shop:

> “Best place in town to take a leak.”

Read, and duly forwarded because some of those were funny as f*ck