An old woman wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery with the remains of her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver, I have a dead pussy.
The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and said, "Sit with my wife. You two have a lot in common.
didnt get that ??? 
I guess you are playing with the words? Sorry I am a brazilian trying to get into the British humour… lol 
OK! Got it! Someone has just told me what I have missed… 
Feel so silly now! Jay can I delete the previous post?
Hahaha, brilliant, Cezar, No, we like to document your funnies 
BTW Cezar, is 99% of couriers in London from Brazil?
When I was looking for a part for my bike the only people I’ve seen and met were brazilians
Working in the garages, waiting for their bikes, coming in and out…Everyone was speaking portuguese!
When I hear two couriers at the traffic lights - Brazilians
I was asking for directions two couriers at the petrol station - Brazilians
Funny joke… LOL
Funny Cezar… LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL…
He probably never watched a Warner Bros cartoon where Pepe le Phew was looking for his Pussy(cat)
It’s true Rottie, they’re all Brazilian!
Nice one Jay your reply was better than the joke HAHA 
Yeah! yeah! yeah! Just dont forget how many of you would be having a converssation with me in my language??? lol
You can take a piss ok I dont mind ! have been in much worse situation becouse of a poor knowledge of the ‘Queen’s’ language…
Enjoying the moment that I’m already embarrassed I will tell you guys one of the troubles I have been through becouse of it… Let me choose one less want-to-kill-myself…
Ok! My first use of the wash machine!
I had this really nice pair of trousers with me on my first week in London and i had to wash it. There was nobody in the house I was at the time.
So I got a chair and placed it right in front of the wash machine… I was studying the buttons… Found the ‘on and off’ buttons and thought, ‘this ones I know!’
Let me explane that in Brasil I always had it done for me. I had never been near one of those machines, or Cooker, or any domestic appliance… 
Ok, sure enough had to find the SOAP ! The wash machine was in the kitchen and by the sink, near the cooker. So, I went upstairs to my bedroom and got throught my dictionary to find the word SOAP from Portuguese to English.
Found it, closed the dictionary, went rushing down stairs repeating to myself ‘SOAP,SOAP,SOAP,SOAP,SOAP!’ Got to the kitchen and started to look for the thing. Found on the next door shelf quite a few packs of it (in my thoughts). Opened the pack, put it into the w ash machine… Closed the door and pressed ‘on’ …
I sat there for a while looking at my beloved, and very expensive designer trousers spinning arount inside that thing… I start to regrect to tell you guys it now…
Anyway! I made a mistake! but only for one letter!!! Instead the bloddy SOAP, I got the bloddy SOUP out of the shelf !!!
Yeah, yeah! you can laugh! My truosers? I had to throw it away off course! How the hell would I explane to the house owner what I have done without speak English???
pmsl Cezar, you are one funny man…
thank you Cezar that did make you laugh but don’t worry even if you know english we still F### up like that mate and we are laughing with you not at you Mate
