DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN’S PERSONAL ADS
40-ish - 49
Adventurous - Slept with everyone
Athletic - No tits
Average looking - Ugly
Beautiful - Pathological liar
Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure - On medication
Feminist - Fat
Free spirit - Junkie
Friendship first - Former very friendly person
Fun - Annoying
New Age - Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded - Desperate
Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate - Sloppy drunk
Professional - Bitch
Voluptuous - Very Fat
Large frame - Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate - Stalker
WOMEN’S ENGLISH 1. Yes = No
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No = Yes
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Maybe = No
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We need = I want
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I am sorry = you’ll be sorry
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We need to talk = you’re in trouble
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Sure, go ahead = you better not
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Do what you want = you will pay for this later
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I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron!
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You’re very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?
MEN’S ENGLISH
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
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I am sleepy = I am sleepy
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I am tired = I am tired
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Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
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I love you = let’s have sex now
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I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
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May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you
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Can I call you sometime? = I’d like to have sex with you
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Do you want to go to a movie? = I’d like to have sex with you
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Can I take you out to dinner? = I’d like to have sex with you
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Those shoes don’t go with that outfit = I’m gay
funny. 