Fk, Fk, F**k

I totally agree, but why?


Wass up Toby?

It’s beginning to look like FB Statuses in here :smiley:


Sounds serious

OK Tobi, what you have done?

On the F… note. Two close calls on my ride this evening. My favorite A12, first some “almost footballers” twats in Mondeo Estate join A12 without looking, just like that, I just had in mind my Mrs on YZF on left line as she would be wiped out by these idiots. But well kids… Next traffic lights me doing not much over 40, green light shown, spot on no traffic on my line other lines slowly starting, and blue f… knows what (corsa or smth small) decide that he can do it in this sports car on his right turn red light. A bit hazard avoidance and luckily for me and Mrs just close call. Mrs shaken but confirmed me that we had that green light… So two close calls because of two idiots who don’t believe that highway code and/or traffic lights are things to pay attention to. If we were on the bike I can predict two or at least one fatality.

So if you think that amber or red are ok to go then **** You and your family hope you will die to avoid anyone else to.

Thank you very much for reading.


PS. Why family? Because if one of my relatives would be a red light twat I would pointed this to him clear and straight enough to pass the message.
PS2. Still upset but you may notice that.

Anyone got any jobs going?
Something with a salary at the back end?
You know those things the Tories keep telling us are everywhere but seem never to materialise cos apparently if you’re over 25, you’re supposed to either run your own company or you’re officially dead cos you aren’t " a winner driving a BMW"?

Next muther-fecker who tells me they’ve spunked 14 grand on a brand new motorbike will officially fall foul of the “Ranty man has had it up to his nexk with overpaid bastids who have jobs” clause…

Sorry, just bored of recession… need work… anything considered assuming my skills hit the right requirements

Thanks for listening

Keep going Tobi - spent a months out of work on a couple of occasions and appreciate it can be frustrating as hell. Something will turn up.


Spunk a grand on a HGV licence and you’ll get as much agency work as you want. In the right places, you’ll have some great work-mates and a proper laugh, though in the majority, you’ll work with some right chip-on-the-shoulder knuckle-dragging thickos. You takes your pic. Money around London - easily £30k a year minimum, and often a lot more, and you’ve always got that licence as a fall-back for the future.

Tobi, what is your area of expertise?


Ranting apparently :smiley:

+1 on HGV mate, second best thing I did was get my class 1 - reassuring to know if it all goes wrong for me I should be able to get something driving…

Disturbingly I’m a meeja bitch.
But its so dammed specific, it bears no relevance to real world work… I can shout at a camera crew, persuade an emotional woman to show me her X-rays, and corner and MP into intersting revelations… but what’s that give me in day to day to terms, UNLESS I’m working in telly… and these days, telly is for 12 years olds… you pass 30 and you’re deemed too qualified to be of any use… or at best, too expensive to even consider…

HGV licence sounds like a good fall back, been considering taxi/black cab knowledge as one option and bakery as another… but all potential is overridden by the overiding desire to pay the fekcin g bills and then relax… which hasn’t happened for a stretch…

SORRY. Dead thread I know, but any info on best way to progress HGV would be appreciated. Cheers

Well I’m for sure to thin to understand that one.


HGV - get forms from DVLA website to apply for Provisional Licence. As part of applying, you have to get a medical (can probably also download form from DVLA website). Might as well tick the box to apply for both a HGV and PSV Provisional together, as if you ever wanted to do your PSV as well (within 5 years of the medical), it would save you having to get another medical. Medical is usually around £75 but if you contact your biggest nearest HGV training centre, they might have the doc visit them every Friday (for example) to do them at a cheaper rate of say £50-60.

As soon as you have your Provisional, get your Theory & Hazard Perception Tests booked (roughly £30 each from memory).

Once you have the above, get onto an HGV training company and book your Class-2 course. Usually Monday-Thursday training (you + one other student take the driving in turns), then your test on the Friday morning. Changed a bit from when I dod it, and you have a couple of other tests to do as part of it all, but your trainer will sort this for you and keep you right… Module 2+4 I think… involves basic stuff like where to look on your motor for stow-aways etc!

Total cost of HGV training usually around £1k. Medical and Theory/Hazard Perception adds another £135(?) on top.

Once you have your licence, register with a couple of agencies and phone them every couple of days. You’ll soon suss out the crap agencies that have the rubbish work, and who is a bit more professional.

Try someone like Wallace, they did my test years back, not sure where in Lon you are?

You might want to spend some time on the net and see if there’s any support in recruiting new drivers - the only sticking point is that hauliers want experience but you can’t get that without someone giving you a chance. There are good firms out there, just gotta search a little.

If driving a truck might seem a little predictable, what about vehicle recovery? It’ll never make you a millionaire but it’s certainly challenging, meet new people everyday and can be pretty interesting when you get in to the accident work… has kept me away from society for many years!

Bein a fact driven flounce, thanks for useful info as opposed to what you normally find in here :wink:

You’re welcome. Further to what Doof says, the main hauliers want experience, and expect you to know the score and be able to do the job from day 1 without having to waste time and money doing any training unless it’s company specific stuff. How do you get the experience?.. As a new driver you’re doing agency work for your first few years, learning as you go, no formal training, just picking things up on the job - not having a clue what you’re doing sometimes, making silly mistakes, but slowly learning as you go. Make your own pension provision and sick pay is government statutory, but the job usually pays enough for you to make personal provision for these areas.

It’s always been a fall-back job for me. That and bus driving which I do pretty regularly. My main job is education, but after 12 years in it, I’m sick to death of it, and after 3 years of saying I’m going to take the plunge and drive full-time, it looks like this is the year.

Driving - not for everyone, but I like it. The people in it who have gotten there through their own efforts and expense, and most of the ex-military people are great to work with. There’s also loads of whingers in the industry who are only there because the dole office threatened to stop their giro if they didn’t attend the (government funded) training. These are the 5hitbags with a chip on their shoulder, and who will happily tell you the best route for a drop is the way with the low bridge on it, or the housing estate with the traffic-calming measures you can’t fit your wagon around. They fell threatened because they think you’re trying to steal their job… the job they tried to avoid like the plague in the first place! :wink:

I have a cat D now so that is a fall back for me, but a HGV driver that can speak English is a bonus so I am reliably informed :smiley: