Afternoon, North End Road SW6 where it crosses the A4.Brand new BMW 7 Series - driven by dapper Victor Meldrew look-a-likey. I’m stopped in front of him and slip into neutral to scratch my ass. Lights change to pedestrian green, I’m just about to lean down to pull in clutch ready for my lights to turn green when… BarrrpBarrrp . Victor is gesticulating madly and pointing at traffic lights ( which are still red ) his message seems to be “The lights are about to change - get out of my way you person who can’t afford a car like mine!”. I consider putting down sidestand walking slowly up to his window and ask if he’s been drinking.
Instead I flick him two fingers and roar off just as lights turn green.
I’m Gonna Beat You From These Lights!
Morning - A4 Brentford - Heathrow Bound. Nice chap in BMW (!) 3 series is behind me as I wait at lights. When they turn amber he roars off nearly taking my kneecap with him - I overtake him within 10 feet and flick him the two fingers as if to say “Did you REALLY think your 0-60 in 8 seconds motor would beat my 0-60 in 4 seconds bike you ******?”
I wouldn’t have minded but an inch to his right and he would have swiped me - asshole!!
These two incidents happened years ago - but it’s strange how they still make my blood boil!!!
When your at the lights with them, lean forward like you are going to give you bike a MASSIVE amount of welly, when the lights change pootle off slowly as they fishtail down the road. Pull up next to them at the next set of lights, lift you visor, look at them and smile in the most sarcastic way you can (practice this in your wing mirror when time allows).
Little piece of advice from personal experience. Should you remonstrate with a cager who has blindly almost shunted you onto the pavement and receive the reply, “What’s your problem, mate?” do not reply, “You driving like an are-brained fck-wit, you c*nt”, as it is liable to offend.
This reminds me of a ride into work one day trying to get up Grosvenor Place towards Hyde Park Corner…
I was in the left hend lane and this nice big mercedes started drifting into my lane from the right while I’m in the blind spot , I had a bus behind me so I sped up a bit level with the passenger window… little old lady perched up on a cushion, not looking anywhere except straight ahead, still drifting towards me. Luckily the traffic came to a stop so I knocked on the passenger window… I wasn’t going to give her any abuse or anything as she looked such a sweet old thing in her nice shiny silver Merc and all her nice old jewellry… she looks over at me and I just pointed at my eyes then at her wing mirror, you know, just asking her to use it every now and again…
She leant over towards me and gave me two fingers and started ranting and raving at me… fecking old byatch. I was too stunned to do anything other than shake my head and ride away.
I don’t get the cagers that try and race bikes they must try it all day long and im sure they never ever win, I gave up racing them I have this bad feeling they might lose control and run me over